Psychological fitness: Spot difference between 'healthy' and 'neurotic' guilt

Since this is an epidemic in the church as well, I thought I would post this as I know many people mix these up all the time. No one in the church ever talks about healthy guilt.

Unresolved feelings of guilt are a common component of depression and low self-esteem. In order to sort through such nagging feelings, it can help to divide guilt into two different types.

The first type is the kind we feel when we've done something we believe to be wrong. We know we did it and we know it violates our personal moral or ethical code. Let's call this a "healthy guilt." It's the feeling that's appropriate and fitting when we've done something wrong.

The second type is the kind of guilt we feel when we really haven't done anything wrong, but feel "as if" we have. Let's call this a "neurotic guilt." It's misplaced and doesn't belong. It's the result of a distortion of responsibility, and it serves no useful or healthy purpose.

Two ways to process guilt

The process for handling or resolving the guilt is different depending on which guilt it is. Healthy guilt needs to be accepted and worked through. Neurotic guilt needs to be challenged and rejected.

We can process healthy guilt by saying, "Although this guilt doesn't taste so good, it's basically good for me so I need to accept it, swallow it, digest it, learn from it and move on." This process teaches us how to take responsibility for mistakes, feel badly about it for a reasonable period of time, make amends if possible, forgive ourselves and get back in the game.

We need to process neurotic guilt very differently. This process says, "This guilt does not belong here, it should not be accepted into the system and it needs to be returned to sender." This process requires that we examine our behavior from an adult, rational perspective and that we not take responsibility for things which were not under our control. The goal is to identify guilt that entered inappropriately and deport it back to where it belongs.

Resolve guilt by processing it correctly

Problems occur when we try to process guilt using the wrong system. If you've messed up and you know it but you're trying to handle it by rejecting the guilt, you might have trouble attaining a sense of peace. A healthy part of you knows you should accept the guilt and allow it to work its way through you, but another part of you is fighting against this. Maybe this is what they mean by "swallow your pride."

On the other hand, if you're blaming yourself for something that was simply not your responsibility, you're trying to ingest a neurotic guilt that really ought to be rejected. A healthy part of you senses that this guilt should not be taken in, but you're having trouble spitting it out.

A reasonable dose of healthy guilt over a reasonable period of time won't hurt you and can even teach you humility, which in turn builds wisdom and personal strength. Holding on to neurotic guilt can cause you to walk with your head hanging low, shrinking from living life freely and fully. If the guilt has your name on it, claim it. If not, let it go.

Art Frenz, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist in private practice. He can be contacted at Psychological Fitness, 1200 Monroe St., Endicott, NY, 13760.

RAISING THE DEAD DREAM by EJ Ouellette

I was working in the audio business installing sound systems in church’s, funeral homes and other institutions. In fact I was sub contracting for the president of the “Audio Engineering Society” in Canada as he also had his own firm. We had been given a contract to re-do a major funeral home in Toronto in 1995 when this event occurred.

We had to work the graveyard shift (9pm to 9am) every night for 2 weeks completely re-doing the sound system on an old four-story mansion in Toronto. They would not close the caskets for us so but instead had to lay plastic drop-sheets over the displayed bodies as we worked. It was very creepy I might add. One evening when I came in I noticed a young boy around 10 years old in a casket. My heart broke as I saw him and the pictures of him on his hockey team with his friends and other family pictures. I started to weep knowing the incredible pain the family must be going through. Without any warning the spirit of God came on me mightily and I nearly fell to the floor. I remembered I could order this boy back to life if I wanted. I felt it was completely possible but seemed to lack any boldness that I sure could have used at that moment. Instead I said it under my breath “In the name of Jesus rise and be made whole”. I was overwhelmed at that moment that it might happen and ran out of that room. I felt terrible I reacted so badly. All night long I expected a young boy to come up behind me, tap me on the shoulder and ask for a ride home.

That day I couldn’t sleep. I was riddled with guilt knowing I could have done something but totally wimped out. I repented over and over again begging God to forgive me for not getting out of the boat. I finally fell asleep and had this dream.

I dreamed I was at another funeral home. It was a brand new place and I had been working at that home previously. I saw a black man in a casket and the family all around crying and wailing away. This time I was full of boldness as I rushed into that room, ordered that man to come back to life and he did. He sat up in his casket and the whole family fainted. I mean fell out of their chairs to the newly carpeted floor! The funeral director came running down the hall hearing the commotion and saw that man sitting in his coffin, smiling like that cat that ate the canary. And he screamed at me “YOU CANT DO THAT!” To which I replied, “I just did”.

I awoke at that point feeling somewhat relieved and Jesus immediately spoke to me “The time will come soon”.

I believe with all my heart that day is coming soon and that we are at the door. Even now I notice a new boldness in me.

EJ Ouellette

New World Order is here.Banned Episode: Conspiracy Theory with Jesse Ventura - Police State

The Beast out of the Earth

Revelation 13:11 Then I saw a second beast, coming out of the earth. It had two horns like a lamb, but it spoke like a dragon. 12 It exercised all the authority of the first beast on its behalf, and made the earth and its inhabitants worship the first beast, whose fatal wound had been healed.13 And it performed great signs, even causing fire to come down from heaven to the earth in full view of the people. 14 Because of the signs it was given power to perform on behalf of the first beast, it deceived the inhabitants of the earth. It ordered them to set up an image in honor of the beast who was wounded by the sword and yet lived. 15 The second beast was given power to give breath to the image of the first beast, so that the image could speak and cause all who refused to worship the image to be killed. 16 It also forced all people, great and small, rich and poor, free and slave, to receive a mark on their right hands or on their foreheads, 17 so that they could not buy or sell unless they had the mark, which is the name of the beast or the number of its name.

18 This calls for wisdom. Let the person who has insight calculate the number of the beast, for it is the number of a man.[e] That number is 666.

EXORCISM DREAM -by EJ Ouellette

May 25, 2012

Dreamt I was called in to do an exorcism at someone’s house. When I got there, there was man in a living room sitting in a chair shouting all kinds of scriptures at me. He seemed perturbed at me and all those around him seemed genuinely upset. I could see clearly that a spirit of delusion had come over him. All things he said seemed to make sense but it was all completely void of the spirit of God. He was no interested in knowing the difference and I kinda felt if I argued with him it would be like arguing with Satan himself. I decided to not respond to his insanity but instead I started casting out the spirit of delusion. Nothing happened! I did it 3 times but no avail. The people who called for me looked distraught, as they didn’t know what to do. I knew that casting out these powerful demons needed fasting for three days first, as I have done many in the past. I would never attempt this unless I had fasted first. Since they just called me I had no time and knew I would have to come back instead. It was then that I realized that this man was under Judgment like King Nebuchadnezzar and his pride had snared him. Most likely he would be under a tree for a long time growling like a dog and not in his right mind until he repented. I knew I could not help him so I left.

When I awoke it scared me that someone could be so deluded thinking they were right when they had completely missed the boat. I remembered a girl I prophesied to years ago, that unless she repented she would become like king Nebuchadnezzar and find herself under a tree barking like a dog. She was committed to an asylum almost immediately and is still there today. EJ Ouellette

Discipleship Is Not a Dirty Word by Lee Grady

Discipleship Is Not a Dirty Word

Wednesday, 09 May 2012 08:54 AM EDT J. Lee GradyNewsletters - Fire In My Bones

Reclaiming the process of discipleship will require a total overhaul of how we do church.

I get funny looks from some charismatic Christians when I tell them I believe God is calling us back to radical discipleship. Those in the over-50 crowd—people who lived through the charismatic movement of the 1970s—are likely to have a bad taste in their mouths when it comes to the dreaded “D word.”

That’s because the so-called Discipleship Movement (also known as the Shepherding Movement and the VINEYARD church) turned a vital biblical principle into a weapon and abused people with it. Churches that embraced the warped doctrines of shepherding required believers to get permission from their pastors before they bought cars, got pregnant or moved to a new city. Immature leaders became dictators, church members became their loyal minions, and the Holy Spirit’s fire was snuffed out because of a pervasive spirit of control.

"Reclaiming this process of discipleship is going to require a total overhaul of how we do church. Do we really want to produce mature disciples who have the character of Jesus and are able to do His works? Or are we content with shallow believers and shallow faith?”

I don’t ever want to live through that again. I know countless people who are still licking their wounds from the spiritual abuse they suffered while attending hyper-controlling churches in the 1970s and ‘80s. Some of them still cannot trust a pastor today; others walked away from God because leaders misused their authority—all in the name of “discipleship.”

Yet I’m still convinced that relational discipleship—a strategy Jesus and the apostle Paul modeled for us—is as vital as ever. If anything the pendulum has now swung dangerously in the opposite direction. In today’s free-wheeling, come-as-you-are, pick-what-you-want, whatever-floats-your-boat Christianity, we make no demands and enforce no standards. We’re just happy to get warm rumps in seats. As long as people file in and out of the pews and we do the Sunday drill, we think we’ve accomplished something.

But Jesus did not command us to go therefore and attract crowds. He called us to make disciples (see Matt. 28:19), and that cannot be done exclusively in once-a-week meetings, no matter how many times the preacher can get the people to shout or wave handkerchiefs. If we don’t take immature Christians through a discipleship process (which is best done in small groups or one-on-one gatherings), people will end up in a perpetual state of immaturity.

David Kinnaman, author of the excellent book un-Christian, articulated the problem this way: “Most people in America, when they are exposed to the Christian faith, are not being transformed. They take one step into the door, and the journey ends. They are not being allowed, encouraged, or equipped to love or to think like Christ. Yet in many ways a focus on spiritual formation fits what a new generation is really seeking. Transformation is a process, a journey, not a one-time decision.”

Reclaiming this process of discipleship is going to require a total overhaul of how we do church. Do we really want to produce mature disciples who have the character of Jesus and are able to do His works? Or are we content with shallow believers and shallow faith?

A friend of mine had to face this question while he was pastoring in Florida. As a young father, he had a habit of putting his infant son in a car seat and driving him around his neighborhood at night in order to lull him to sleep. Once during this ritual the Holy Spirit spoke to this pastor rather bluntly. He said: “This is what you are doing in your church. You are just driving babies around.”

My friend came under conviction. He realized he had fallen into the trap of entertaining his congregation with events and programs, even though the people were not growing spiritually. He was actually content to keep them in infancy. As long as they filled their seats each Sunday, and paid their tithes, he was happy. Yet no one was growing, and they certainly were not producing fruit by reaching others for Christ.

How can we make this paradigm shift in to discipleship? How can we add “the D word” back into our vocabulary?

Churches must stop exclusively focusing on big events and get people involved in small groups, where personal ministry can take place.

We must stop treating people like numbers and get back to valuing relationships.

Leaders must reject the celebrity preacher model and start investing their lives in individuals.

When we stand before Christ and He evaluates our ministries, He will not be asking us how many people sat in our pews, watched our TV programs, gave in our telethons or filled out response cards. He is not going to evaluate us based on how many people fell under the power of God or how many healings we counted in each service. He will ask how many faithful disciples we made. I pray we will make this our priority.

J. Lee Grady is the former editor of Charisma and the director of The Mordecai Project. You can follow him on Twitter at leegrady. His latest book is 10 Lies Men Believe (Charisma House).

Strange Sun Rise in Hawaii !!! (May.11-15.2012) Planet X Nibiru

GREECE-RUN ON BANKS-is this the David Wilkerson prophecy coming true?

ATHENS- Greece put a senior judge in charge of an emergency government on Wednesday to lead it to new elections on June 17 and bankers sought to calm public fears after the president said political chaos risked causing panic and a run on deposits.

Greeks have been withdrawing hundreds of millions of euros (dollars) from banks in recent days as the prospect of the country being forced out of the European Union’s common currency zone seems ever more real — although there has so far been no sign of a run on bank branches in Athens.

Political leaders failed to form a government following an inconclusive parliamentary election on May 6, leaving the state with its coffers almost empty and no elected cabinet in place to satisfy lenders it deserves the money needed to stay afloat.

After meeting President Karolos Papoulias, whose powers as head of state are limited, heads of various parties which won seats in parliament named the new interim leader as Panagiotis Pikrammenos, who runs the supreme administrative court.

A new poll confirmed what other surveys have shown: that radical leftists who reject a bailout agreed with the European Union and International Monetary Fund are now poised for victory, and the establishment parties that agreed the rescue are sinking further after an historic wipeout 10 days ago.

The leftists argue they can tear up the bailout and keep the euro, but European leaders say if Greece fails to meet promises to them, lenders will pull the plug on financing, driving Athens to bankruptcy and a swift exit from the EU single currency.

On Monday, according to an official account, the president told party chiefs that figures collated by the central bank headed by George Provopoulos showed savers withdrew at least 700 million euros ($890 million) from banks.

“Provopoulos told me there was no panic, but there was great fear that could develop into a panic,” minutes of the cabinet meeting quoted the president as saying.

“Withdrawals and outflows by 4 p.m. when I called him exceeded 600 million euros and reached 700 million euros,” he said. “He expects total outflows of about 800 million euros, including conversions into German Bunds and other such things.”

Several banking sources told Reuters similar amounts had also been withdrawn on Tuesday. Nevertheless, there was no sign of panic or queues at bank branches in Athens on Wednesday. Bankers dismissed suggestions that a bank run was looming.

A senior executive at a large Greek bank told Reuters: “There is no bank run, no queues or panic. The situation is better than I expected. The amount of deposit withdrawals the president mentioned referred to three days, not one.”

Still, some were taking no risks. A 60-year-old textiles store owner who gave his name only as Nasos said he had transferred 10,000 euros over the phone to a bank in fellow eurozone state Cyprus on Tuesday afternoon.

“Any way you see it, things are difficult. If they call elections on June 17—a Sunday—then everyone will take their money out on the Friday.” That June 17 date was

Greeks have already been withdrawing their savings from banks at a sharp clip — nearly a third of bank deposits were withdrawn between January 2010 and March 2012, reducing total Greek household and business deposits to 165 billion euros.

A senior bank executive said there had been withdrawals in recent days but there was no sign yet of a panic, as had happened in April 2010 when 8 billion euros were withdrawn just before Greece obtained its first foreign bailout.

Analysts predicted Greece would avoid a bank run, if only because so many people have pulled out their savings already.

“We have witnessed periods of tension before when the banks experienced large outflows. In my view, the majority of people with these concerns would have done so by now,” said Alex Tsirigotis, Greek banks analyst at Mediobanca.

Greek banks have made up for vanishing deposits on their balance sheets by accepting costlier European Central Bank financing through the Greek central bank.

The spectre of Greece quitting the single currency sent the euro and European shares to a fresh four-month low on Wednesday and raised the yields on Spanish and Italian debt, reflecting the risk that other European countries will be hurt.

Patience is wearing thin among EU policymakers exasperated that a country which accounts for barely 2 percent of the euro zone’s economy should drag the bloc into deep crisis yet again.

“The 16 other governments in the euro zone really are at the end of their patience with Greece. There isn’t room or any willingness to move,” said one official involved in talks over Greece at the European Commission. “The decisions are really in Athens’s hands. But it doesn’t look good.”

European Commission President Jose Manuel Barroso told a news conference in Brussels that Greeks must realise what was at stake in their election: “It is important that the Greek people now take a decision fully informed about the consequences.”

DREAMS FULFILLED FROM THE PAST -EJ Ouellette

In September 2004 

In September 2004 

I had a dream. I saw the ocean between two major countries from high up in space. I was looking down when I saw a great stirring in the water. I wasn't sure what it was but then suddenly in the middle of the stirring I saw a calendar floating on the water and the date was December 26. I don’t often get dates in dreams but in this one it was very clear. I told a friend about it overseas and he thought I was crazy for telling everyone that something was going to take place on that date. He warned me that I would be making a fool of myself if I did and if nothing happened. Well such is the life of a prophet I said and just ignored him.

On December 26-2004 the tsunami in Indonesia happened and I never heard back from him.

In September 2007 I had a dream that 5 angels came to me to tell me the stock market was about to collapse.

I told many people including my doubting Thomas friend and again he rebuked me, for sending it out.  I had told another friend who completely lost it at a restaurant when I told him and made a huge scene calling me a fool in front of everyone for even suggesting that his beloved God the stock market would crash.

On October 6th 2008 the stock market crashed.

I never heard from him again.

On April 23 1986 I dreamt radiation was going to fall over the world. The voice of the Lord came to and asked me to pray.

On April 26th 1986 the Chernobyl Disaster took place.

On March 20th 1989 I had a dream in which I was floating high above the earth. Down below I could see the Alaska coastline. Suddenly I was on the Alaskan beach and black tar started to roll under my bare feet. Everywhere I looked people looked down and moaned.

The Exxon Valdez oil spill occurred in Prince William Sound, Alaska, on March 24, 1989, when the Exxon Valdez, an oil tanker bound for Long Beach, California, struck Prince William Sound's Bligh Reef and spilled 260,000 to 750,000 barrels (41,000 to 119,000 m3) of crude oil.[1][2] It is considered to be one of the most devastating human-caused environmental disasters.

On June 21 1985 I dreamt I was aboard a very large commercial jet. I was up in the cockpit when I heard a loud explosion in the cargo hold underneath the plane. The pilot and I looked at each other in horror knowing we were going to die.

On June 23, 1985, Air India Flight 182 Boeing 747-237B crashed off the southwest coast of Ireland when a bomb exploded in the cargo hold. All 307 passengers and 22 crewmembers died.

Dec 20th 1988 I dreamt of another plane explosion while I was aboard. I remember seeing the body of the plane was black or dark and it was a 747. The pilot again looked at me in horror.

Pan Am Flight 103 was a Boeing 747-121 that was destroyed by a terrorist bomb over the town of Lockerbie, Scotland, on December 21, 1988. The crash killed all 243 passengers and 16 crew and 11 people on the ground (all of whom were residents of Sherwood Crescent, Lockerbie),

In August 2001 I had a dream in which I saw the streets of a Major city covered in white dust and people walking out of the city covered in dust. When I awoke the Lord began to speak to me saying, “The blood of the unborn children cries out to me and I will satisfy their cries. This land and the US shall be laid waste for their murder of the unborn children. No amount of fasting or weeping will cause my arm of Judgment to stop until I have satisfied their cries. For this generation is an abomination in my sight.”

ON September 11th 2001 The Twin towers in NY were demolished.

On April 15th 2010 I sent out a dream about oil spilling everywhere and it wouldn’t stop.

On April 20th 2010 The BP deepwater horizon spill took place in the gulf of Mexico which lasted three months.

I could go on and on as I had these prophecies since I was very young.  I once estimated that I have had over 10,000 Dreams about the future that took place in one form or another. In other words most of my dreams are literal but there are some that were symbolic that I could not identify until the dream took place. I excluded many that would be exposing the evil government behind these.

Its now 2012 and I have had countless dreams concerning the end of the USA in the near future and know beyond a shadow of doubt they will take place. They only thing that could change the outcome of course is repentance and I’ve never once seen that, only arrogant people posing as Christians defending their stupidity.

EJ Ouellette

DREAM OF DEC 21 by EJ Ouellette

12-05-12 Dream: 

I dreamt I saw Nostradamus on a hill overlooking the ocean. He was dressed in old-fashioned clothes of the 1500s era. Next to him were several scientists dressed in clothes of the same period. I could hear him speak to the scientists warning them of the coming disasters to the world. He said, “This is not the first time these planets have passed this way and each time caused immense destruction”. The other scientists looked very depressed at the news and looked down. I turned to my left and looked out over the world and saw a calendar floating in the sky. It read Dec 21. The page tore off and there were no pages behind it. Suddenly I saw the earth rip and tear and huge earthquakes happen all at once. The oceans flooded inland and overtook the vast coastal cities. I heard someone say “There will be no Christmas this year”. I knew the survivors would be going back to pioneer days after this. I then awoke feeling very sad.

EARTHQUAKE DREAM 7.6 May 10-2012 EJ Ouellette

Had another dream last night about a massive earthquake. Since I had one last week with the same number it aroused my curiosity to see if it meant something else. Often when I get numbers in dreams it is about a scripture reference. In this case when I looked up 'E' (as in earthquake) 7.6 I was shocked when I read the word as it is identical to what the Lord has been speaking to me concerning what is to come over the last two years and doubly this last month. WE are at the door.!

Ezekiel 7 New International Version (NIV) The End Has Come 7 

The word of the Lord came to me: 2 “Son of man, this is what the Sovereign Lord says to the land of Israel: “‘The end! The end has come upon the four corners of the land! 3 The end is now upon you, and I will unleash my anger against you. I will judge you according to your conduct and repay you for all your detestable practices. 4 I will not look on you with pity; I will not spare you. I will surely repay you for your conduct and for the detestable practices among you. “‘Then you will know that I am the Lord.’ 5 “This is what the Sovereign Lord says: “‘Disaster! Unheard-of[a] disaster! See, it comes! 6 The end has come! The end has come! It has roused itself against you. See, it comes! 7 Doom has come upon you, upon you who dwell in the land. The time has come! The day is near! There is panic, not joy, on the mountains. 8 I am about to pour out my wrath on you and spend my anger against you. I will judge you according to your conduct and repay you for all your detestable practices. 9 I will not look on you with pity; I will not spare you. I will repay you for your conduct and for the detestable practices among you. “‘Then you will know that it is I the Lord who strikes you. 10 “‘See, the day! See, it comes! Doom has burst forth, the rod has budded, arrogance has blossomed! 11 Violence has arisen,[b] a rod to punish the wicked. None of the people will be left, none of that crowd— none of their wealth, nothing of value. 12 The time has come! The day has arrived! Let not the buyer rejoice nor the seller grieve, for my wrath is on the whole crowd. 13 The seller will not recover the property that was sold— as long as both buyer and seller live. For the vision concerning the whole crowd will not be reversed. Because of their sins, not one of them will preserve their life. 14 “‘They have blown the trumpet, they have made all things ready, but no one will go into battle, for my wrath is on the whole crowd. 15 Outside is the sword; inside are plague and famine. Those in the country will die by the sword; those in the city will be devoured by famine and plague. 16 The fugitives who escape will flee to the mountains. Like doves of the valleys, they will all moan, each for their own sins. 17 Every hand will go limp; every leg will be wet with urine. 18 They will put on sackcloth and be clothed with terror. Every face will be covered with shame, and every head will be shaved. 19 “‘They will throw their silver into the streets, and their gold will be treated as a thing unclean. Their silver and gold will not be able to deliver them in the day of the Lord’s wrath. It will not satisfy their hunger or fill their stomachs, for it has caused them to stumble into sin. 20 They took pride in their beautiful jewelry and used it to make their detestable idols. They made it into vile images; therefore I will make it a thing unclean for them. 21 I will give their wealth as plunder to foreigners and as loot to the wicked of the earth, who will defile it. 22 I will turn my face away from the people, and robbers will desecrate the place I treasure. They will enter it and will defile it. 23 “‘Prepare chains! For the land is full of bloodshed, and the city is full of violence. 24 I will bring the most wicked of nations to take possession of their houses. I will put an end to the pride of the mighty, and their sanctuaries will be desecrated. 25 When terror comes, they will seek peace in vain. 26 Calamity upon calamity will come, and rumor upon rumor. They will go searching for a vision from the prophet, priestly instruction in the law will cease, the counsel of the elders will come to an end. 27 The king will mourn, the prince will be clothed with despair, and the hands of the people of the land will tremble. I will deal with them according to their conduct, and by their own standards I will judge them. “‘Then they will know that I am the Lord. ’”